The Sports Watercooler

This is MADNESS. NO! THIS.....IS......MARCH!

Alright, so its here. The most exciting week in the sports year (arguments can be made for opening week of college football, the week where they play 3 BCS games, Thanksgiving week, or the week the Masters is on, but I will take this.)

I won't go too in depth here since you can type in any assortment of letters in your browser and get a list of who got snubbed and who will be this year's Cinderellas. But its obviously on the tip of everyone's tongue.

So, Bikes in Trees present: Rules for Making Your Picks*

*Probably should ignore these

Rule 1: Pick lots of upsets. Sure, 75% of the time, your pick is going to be wrong. But who doesn't want to be that guy at the bar when a big upset is happening and you get to be smug and tell everyone you see "I picked that. No big deal." And really, whats more important? Getting the majority of your picks right? Or being the smug asshole at the bar?

Rule 2: Don't pick all 1 seeds to make the Final Four. First off, it never happens. Second off, its just lame and boring.

Rule 3: Bet lots of money on your picks. Sure, you will just lose to the lady in accounting who picked UCLA to win it all because their best player is named Love and that is "sooooo cute", but if you don't have enough money on the line to be screaming over Dan Nelms of Davidson's sloppy play, then what's the point?

Rule 4: Every year a 12 seed upsets a 5. So keep an eye on those games. Except for the one in the East bracket. Nothing bad will happen there. Nothing bad will happen there. Nothing bad wil happen there....

Rule 5: There is always a hot team that comes out of nowhere. Gonzaga, Butler, and George Mason have been those teams recently. Don't worry though, no matter how hard you research it, you won't pick it. So don't worry.

Rule 6: You will be beyond unproductive Thursday and Friday. There are 12 straight hours of basketball on both days. And whether you are camped out in front of the TV with a case of beers, or stuck in your cubicle relying on Stat Tracker you will be fully engrossed. Because lets face it, even if you haven't even heard that Drake existed until 2 weeks ago, you will be cheering like mad that they beat Western Kentucky (or vice versa).

Rule 7: Go with your gut. Somethings, as soon as you look at them, seem obvious. Stick with that. No one like the guy who is constantly saying "Aw, I almost picked that upset!" just because he sat and debated over each game for hours on end. If a game looks like a lock to you, stick with it, its probably true.

Rule 8: Only do one bracket. Sure, it could be fun to have one bracket where you make all your risky picks, a bracket where you pick with your heart, and a bracket where you use your head. Man up. Make one bracket and stick with it. If you hear someone say "aw, I had that one right in my other bracket", compliment their skirt and punch them in the throat.

Rule 9: Have fun out there. Its like youth soccer, only without oranges and halftime. Use your one bracket (see Rule 8) and entire as many pools as possible. In fact, join the Bikes in Trees bracket on facebook (well, join in a day or two, once I set it up). Join one with your college friends, high school friends, family, coworkers, neighbors. Join a pool where its just you and your roommate. Wager over who gets to pay for the next dinner with you and your girlfriend. Wager over money, dares, and honor.

There really isn't a more wonderful time of the sporting year.